Tiger Chainsaw

Wolfenstein 3D Review

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In 1992, id Software, Apogee Software, and FormGen teamed up and released Wolfenstein 3D for the DOS computer. The game was the third installment of the Wolfenstein franchise but it would become the grandfather of all first-person shooters with the help of Tom Hall, John Romero, and John Carmack. We ask Daddy if we can play in this Wolfenstein 3D review!

Wolfenstein 3D Plot:

You play as William “B.J.” Blazkowicz, yes the same one in the modern series, although I like the old version of him much better. B.J. has been captured by the Nazis and thrown into a prison cell after spying on the Nazis.

B.J. manages to kill a guard in his cell and sets out to escape Castle Wolfenstein. During his escape and future missions in the game, he’ll take down Nazi commanders, a mad scientist creating an army of Nazi zombies, and the Fuhrer himself, Hitler!

Wolfenstein 3D Gameplay:

The gameplay is the definition of a video game. It’s the very basics of basics, which made my Wolfenstein 3D review so great. You are on a floor, you must navigate through a maze of corridors filled with Nazis, treasure, and two keys. Find the keys, kill the Nazis, get the treasure, unlock the door, go to the elevator to the next floor, and repeat.

Wolfenstein 3D is credited for spawning the first-person shooter, so that crap you play called “Call of Duty” is the great-grandson of Wolfenstein 3D. id Software shipped Wolfenstein 3D along with a program that could copy and share the game. They actually encouraged it! With that program, the game took off like lightning. Every gamer just had to get their hands on Wolfenstein and for the most part, they did. Now back to the Wolfenstein 3D review, there are six missions. Each mission consists of nine floors filled with treasure, secret passages, and Nazis. The game does show classic video game humor with difficulty settings.

So how tough are you? I played my Wolfenstein 3D review on “Don’t hurt me”. It was somewhat challenging, a few times I died, but for the most part, I coasted through the game. If you up the difficulty, you take much more damage, and the Nazi soldiers are almost tripled so if anyone beat the game on “I am Death incarnate!” (without cheating) you are a Nazi killing god.

As Wolfenstein 3D begins, you start in a jail cell standing over a dead guard. Supposedly, you choked him to death when he entered your cell. Now, you’ve taken his pistol and your goal is to escape the fortress by going up nine floors to freedom. Standing in your way is Nazi guards. There are a few different kinds of Nazi guards throughout the game. As you progress, the guards change. Here are the classes of guards:

These common joes are the most basic guards and are found on every level. They yell “Stop son” when they see you and then scream out when you pump them full of shells.

They are sometimes accompanied by guard dogs. These German shepherds are not very nice and bite violently at you. They are very fast but take only one shot to kill.

These next few guards yell out, outrageous things when they see you and when they die. I refuse to look up what they actually say because it will ruin the game for me and my interpretation of what they are saying. I guess that these guards just love American football by what they scream.

These guys are the toughest guards in the game, they carry machine guns and scream “JOE NAMATH” when they die. Clearly, he was a big influence on their life.

In all seriousness, there is a Google search for what these guards say because no one understands them. Your guess is as good as mine but I refuse to read the truth. Other enemies in the game include zombies in the second mission that do jump-n-jacks and shoot from their stomachs and Hitler-lookalike priests that wear robes, float a foot off the ground, and shoot fireballs from their chests. (This game was historically accurate right down to the enemies!)

These white guards are very fast and zigzag across the room to avoid your shots. When they are killed they scream “my football” which must be their best childhood memory much like the line from Citizen Kane about “Rosebud”.

Four weapons came into my possession during my Wolfenstein 3D review. A knife that is useless unless you have no ammo, a weak pistol, a machine gun that is pretty effective, and a chain gun that blows holes the size of basketballs through anyone standing in your way. Wolfenstein 3D is fantastic inside and out.

It’s an old-school game, which means there are awesome boss battles, secret passages to discover on every level, treasure to collect, and most importantly, cheat codes!

This came especially in handy when you faced the boss of the mission. Floor 9 on every mission held the final boss. They were all tough bosses who would kick your ass if you didn’t know what you were doing. Six bosses in total. The first boss I really don’t know his name, but the others were a mad scientist who throws syringes, (he is the one that created the zombies) a brother and sister named Hansel and Gretel, a rocket scientist who shoots missiles at you, and a general that has a missile launcher as well as a chain gun.

So that leaves one more boss…. and I would easily put him in the top ten bosses in video game history.

Meet Mecha Hitler.

MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL MIL

This guy is so awesome. He has two phases, his metal suit phase, and once you destroy it he loses two chain guns and is in a commander outfit. When he dies, he really dies. He screams “Goodbye, Eva” which is a shout-out to his mistress in real life. (SEE I TOLD YOU THIS GAME IS TOTALLY HISTORICALLY ACCURATE)

But after he dies, he explodes. It’s one of the best deaths in video game history. Don’t believe me? Watch it for yourself.

The death is so awesome, that the game has a death cam and replays Hitler exploding in slow motion. What six-year-old wouldn’t think that’s the greatest thing in life?

Is this the greatest death in video game history? Tough to top.

Now, I don’t know if I ever beat Wolfenstein 3D as a kid, I don’t remember fighting the final boss. (It wasn’t Mecha Hitler) so a few weeks ago I decided to give the game another try after a 15-year hiatus. This time I played it THERE WAS NO CHEATING during my Wolfenstein 3D review.

It aged beautifully, the gameplay was just as fun as I remembered, the secrets were exciting to find, the rush of finding ammo or health when running low was great and of course, the bosses were fantastic. I beat the game in six days as I took on a mission a day. Each mission lasted roughly 2-3 hours. Each floor you climbed got much tougher, not because of the enemies, but because of the layout. By the end of the game, I mentally had to map out the floor and look for markers because the floor itself was such a maze to navigate. I love engaging stories but Wolfenstein 3D didn’t need one because of its engulfing gameplay. Each mission came with a description but it wasn’t in-depth by any means.

The hardest part of my Wolfenstein 3D review was some of the crazy mazes on the floors, you had to find the two keys and then the elevator, all three things were heavily guarded. Bosses would kill me occasionally and I would have to try 2-5 times to beat them. The final boss was a huge dick. He surrounded himself with about 100 guards you have to kill to get to him, then he has his personal guards that are in the room with him. You need to kill them first because they will shoot you in the back in you don’t. It took me probably 15 tries just to get to him and another 15 to kill him. That was in the second easiest setting so I can’t imagine the hardest.

Memories:
I remember when I first laid eyes on this game. I was very young, maybe six, or seven. My dad was the radiologist manager at the local hospital and one of his employees had this game. He brought it home and for some reason put it on the top shelf of our hallway closet where we kept the coats. I remember walking by the closet one day and my dad was in there shuffling things around, he pulled the game down and showed me the box that the game came in. Now I’m not sure what possessed my dad to think I should be allowed to play this game because nothing says “child-friendly game” like box art with nazis falling to their death, machine guns going off and a man ripped out of his mind screaming. After all, my parents were pretty strict. There was no swearing or alcohol in our house and the Simpsons were off-limits most of the time. So for some reason, killing nazis in the name of America slipped past my dad.

This was back in the 90s when gaming was really starting to take off. We had just purchased a new DOS computer operating system (OH MY GOD THE FUTURE IS HERE) and along with the computer we had a cool black and purple joystick.

The only game I ever used the joystick for was Wolfenstein 3D. It was perfect for the navigation of the game and the satisfying click of a trigger like a gun. (Yes, I was a sadistic child)

One of my older sisters and I used to play this game when we were younger. She is four years older than me so she understood the game basics better than I did at the time. We could beat the first few floors on mission one on our own but after that, we would get stuck or die against a never-ending horde of Nazis. That all changed when my friend, (the same one with Blackthorne and Driver) who had the game told me about a cheat code that would be embedded in my memory forever. Three simple keys pressed in sequence held down gave you full ammo and health as well as both keys to the level. Those famous keys were “M” “I” “L”. We mashed those buttons together more times than I can count and soon were stacking Nazi bodies on top of each other.

Wolfenstein 3D Review Score:

Overall, this is a fantastic game for the computer, it was the God Father of first-person shooters, literally the layout, settings, and concept all set the groundwork for games like Doom and Duke Nukem.

Wolfenstein 3D scores a 9.5 out of 10.

What would you write in your Wolfenstein 3D review? When did you first play Wolfenstein 3D? Who was your favorite boss to kill? Where does Mecha-Hilter rank among the best bosses of all time? Let me know your memories and thoughts, I’d love to read the comments!

Shadow of the Colossus Review

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With the release of Ico in 2001, Team Ico found critical success but the commercial success was yet to come due to little marketing and a terrible game cover. In 2005, developers SCE Japan Studio and Team Ico partnered up again and released Shadow of the Colossus for the PlayStation 2. The game was met with strong critical and commercial success as it overshadowed just about every game in the PS2 library. Let’s take a look at what makes Shadow of the Colossus a landmark in video game history. The argument that video games are an art form starts here in this Shadow of the Colossus review.

Shadow of the Colossus Plot:

This is one of the most beautiful stories and because it’s in the form of a video game, you experience it for yourself. Team Ico has a minimalist approach to storytelling letting the player put together the small pieces for themselves. It was a treat to live this story during my Shadow of the Colossus review.

You are a young man named Wander. His lover named Mono has been slain or perhaps sacrificed and he has set off to resurrect her. With his trusty horse Agro, Wander and Mono’s body arrive at a sacred temple located in a forbidden land. Inside this small temple is an entity called Dormin. Wander believes that Dormin can resurrect Mono and makes a deal with it. Dormin thinks it’s possible to give the girl life but needs Wander to slay 16 colossi. These colossi walk, swim and fly throughout the surrounding land peacefully. Colossi are giants, made from stones, lands, and dirt that tower over nearly everything.

Legends say that Dormin was a powerful magic demon whose soul was split into 16 different pieces and placed into these colossi. For Dormin to perform the magic spell and resurrect Mono, he will need to be whole again. Wander sets off and kills the colossi one-by-one with an ancient sword. During this time, a man named Lord Emon and his warriors are on their way to the forbidden land to stop Wander’s quest knowing how dangerous Dormin is.

As Wander slays the colossi, he begins to change physically. His body is poisoned, overtaken by the fragments of Dormin. By the time he slays the final colossi, he is almost unrecognizable. There’s tons of lore to Shadow of the Colossi and it’s fun to speculate what is happening to Wander. Is his soul being cursed for the sins he is committing? Is Dormin slowly taking over his body? Whatever it is, it’s tough to imagine what Wander is going through. He is ultimately sacrificing himself to give the love of his life a second chance, but is it worth it? He won’t be there to see it. Was he unable to continue his life without Mono and if that’s the case, what makes him think Mono will be able to carry on without him? It’s a beautiful idea of what love is and the power and worth of sacrifice.

When Wander returns to the temple, he has small horns, his hair is dark, his skin and eyes pale with his face twisted in darkness. Lord Emon and his men have arrived at the temple and attack Wander. He falls to the ground next to the pedestal that holds Mono’s body but it isn’t the end of him. Dormin has become whole again and takes control of Wander’s body transforming him into a dark shadow. Lord Emon takes the ancient sword that Wander had used to slay the Colossi and creates a whirlwind of light that traps Dormin within the temple. The temple and bridge to it begin to collapse as Lord Emon barely escapes. The forbidden land is now cut off from the rest of the world.

Mono has been resurrected. She finds Agro limping into the crumbled temple and walks toward a small pool of water where Dormin and Wander fell. Mono finds a baby infant with little horns on its head. With the child in her arms, Mono follows Agro to higher grounds around the temple revealing a secret garden as the game ends.

Is the baby infant with horns Ico from the first game that was released four years previously? That’s for you to decide, but I like to think so.

Shadow of the Colossus Gameplay:

Shadow of the Colossus is a minimalist game, excuse me I should say a minimalist perfect game. The task that is presented to Wander is simple. Slay these 16 colossi, and get your wish. There are no other beings to interact with. As Wander, you have your horse Agro and that’s it. Equipped with just a sword and a bow, I set out to do the impossible during my Shadow of the Colossus review.

The ancient sword that Wander has shines a light toward the nearest colossi. Even in a land with few objects or landmarks, you’ll never be lost. The was sword as helpful as a guide as it is slaying the colossi while I played through my Shadow of the Colossus review. These colossi that you slay vary in different forms of beasts. They swim, fly and walk on land but it is up to you to figure out how to murder them. I use the word murder because that’s what it feels like. They feel like innocent beings just minding their own business until you attack them. I think that’s part of the charm of the game. You are committing horrible acts to revive your love which is a beautiful act in itself. Would you commit these murders of innocent peaceful giants to revive someone you love? I’d like to think I would and ultimately I’d end up paying the price as Wander does.

If you love boss fights, you’ll love Shadow of the Colossus. It’s nothing but boss fights. No leveling up, no grinding, no killing hordes of weak enemies. It’s just you and 16 walking giants. Each of them comes uniquely with attacks, defenses, and weak points. Wander will need to climb up the beasts using their fur and various other means to make his way to their weak points. It’s not always obvious where the weak point is, but they are marked by glowing glyphs. Wander will need to stab them repeatedly to drain them of life. The colossi will attack and try to shake you off as you continue to climb up them. There’s a grip meter making it possible to only hold on for so long. You’ll need to balance when to stay put and when to climb to reach their weak point.

Each fight with the colossi during my Shadow of the Colossus review took anywhere from five to fifteen minutes. I died a few times fighting them and a few times I had no idea what I was doing. When they fall, it’s a feeling of accomplishment mixed with sorrow for the dead giant. At least it was for me, perhaps you don’t have a soul and felt nothing.

Music plays a big role when you fight the colossi giving the moment a sense of epicness. When you are out on the land by yourself and Agro, it’s silence gives you the sense that you are truly alone in this land.

If I have to pick out something about my Shadow of the Colossus review that isn’t perfect it’d be the playtime. I beat it within a weekend maybe ten hours of gameplay? It’s on the shorter end but it’s a wonderful game.

Memories:

I didn’t play Shadow of the Colossus until after it had been released for over ten years. I had heard nothing but praise and great things about the game but never had time to play it. Finally, I got the HD collection of Ico and Shadow of the Colossus on the PS3 and sunk my teeth into it. I was immediately drawn to the story and the struggle between killing these innocent beasts and reviving your lover. Most of the colossi I stared at in awe, but that water eel gave me the creeps. I have a friend who got this game for his sixteenth birthday. Since then he has beaten it almost twenty times.

Shadow of the Colossus Review Score:

If you want to argue that video games are a form of art (they are) start with Shadow of the Colossus and the wonderful story it spins. It captures so many emotions with so little in the actual world of Shadow of the Colossus. Everything feels perfectly placed including the music. Bravo to Team Ico.

Shadow of the Colossus scores a perfect 10 out of 10.

What would you write in your Shadow of the Colossus review? What was your favorite colossi to slay? Did you feel bad doing it? What is your interpretation of Shadow of the Colossi? Let me know your thoughts and memories, I’d love to read them!

Harvest Moon GBC 2 Review

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The Harvest Moon craze was in full bloom by 2000. In three years since the first release on the Super Nintendo, Harvest Moon was on the SNES, Nintendo 64, Game Boy, PlayStation, and Game Boy Color. Developed by Victor Interactive Software and published by Natsume, Harvest Moon Game Boy Color 2 was the second edition of the popular mobile version. Hand-held farming is now in color so let’s plow into this Harvest Moon GBC 2 review!

Harvest Moon GBC 2 Plot:

I’ve reviewed the original Harvest Moon for the SNES and the first Harvest Moon for the Game Boy. Both versions held similar stories involving the player taking over their deceased grandfather’s land and tasked with turning into a profitable farm. Harvest Moon Game Boy Color 2 shook up the plot. A mayor of a dwindling town believes the town is in danger of a financial collapse. Seeing an old abandoned farmland outside of town, the mayor wants to turn it into an amusement park to help bring in money.

A successful farmer from a neighboring town volunteers to take over the farmland and turn it into a profitable land for the town. It’s rumored that the farmer is the first player from Harvest Moon GB. The mayor gives his consent to the farmer and says he has three years to turn the farm into a success.

Three years is a long time in Harvest Moon so if you can’t get the farm up and running then you really suck. Again, my wife played this version for me so she’ll share some input from her time playing it for my Harvest Moon GBC 2 review.

Harvest Moon GBC 2 Gameplay:

The gameplay rarely ever changes in Harvest Moon games. Clear the land, grow the crops, raise the animals, and make friends with the villagers. It’s a recipe for success in every Harvest Moon. This one is no different so if you’ve read my reviews on Harvest Moon and Harvest Moon GB, you’ll be up to speed on the tasks ahead of you as you play.

In this Harvest Moon GBC 2 review, you can choose to play as a boy or girl. Each one comes with different benefits and seeds you can purchase. My wife ALWAYS plays as a boy farmer. The following seeds are exclusive to the boy: turnip, tomato, peanut, broccoli, sage, saffron, geranium, and primrose. Seeds that are exclusive to the girl are potato, corn, eggplant, carrot, rosemary, orchid, camomile, and lavender. Each gender will be able to purchase the following seeds: asparagus, melon, sweet potato, napa, and grass. As you can see, Harvest Moon GBC 2 offers replayability with crops.

Raising animals is another critical component of having a successful farm. After playing Harvest Moon and Harvest Moon GB, my wife was excited to raise a third kind of animal. Cows and chickens have long been an essential pipeline of wealth in the series, but Harvest Moon GBC 2 introduced sheep. You can sell the milk from cows, the eggs from chickens, and the wool from sheep. Making sure all the animals are well-fed and cared for will result in larger qualities.

Tools will help you tremendously as you build up the farm. You’ll get basic tools first but just like the rest of the Harvest Moons, you can upgrade and get special ones. The one that made the biggest difference in her Harvest Moon GBC 2 review was the Miracle Glove which you find after using a treasure map. It gives you the ability to pocket your crops instead of having to carry each one to the stationed box at the top of your field, saving you lots of time. Marriage is not an option in this Harvest Moon like it was in the original on the SNES. Relationships are still important however as building up friendships will result in special events and better tools being given to you. If you grow tired of all the farming, you can take a break and fish. There are 18 kinds of fish to catch including eels, catfish, and carp.

Events continue to be a nice change of pace in the game. Each season comes with unique events like horse races, hurricanes, blizzards, Thanksgiving, and various festivals like New Years, flower, star, moon, harvest, and “Holy Night” which is Christmas. Some of these events offer a photo for you to put into your scrapbook to remember them.

The three years you are given to turn the farm into a thriving land is plenty. You should be up and running at near full strength by the end of the first year which makes the next two years for our Harvest Moon GBC 2 review go by slowly. It’s too much time in my wife’s opinion and makes the game drag on. She had a hard time finding the motivation to grow the same crops over and over each season just to see the ending. The Game Boy Color doesn’t offer vibrant options of colors, but it seemed like any screen you were on was out of a children’s coloring book or programmed with MS-DOS Paint.

I think Harvest Moon GBC 2 review would have benefited from a shorter timeframe and a few more events. It became a chore for my wife to play as her enthusiasm for the game waned as the years in the game passed. The greenhouse was a cool idea, but she didn’t use it much. Tending to her crops and animals took too much time.

Memories:
After playing Harvest Moon for the SNES and Harvest Moon GB, I think my wife hit the wall with Harvest Moon GBC2 especially because it looked so similar to Harvest Moon GB. My wife was able to save the farm from becoming an amusement park, but really would that of been so bad?

Harvest Moon GBC 2 Review Score:

The added color doesn’t make a big difference. It was refreshing to see a new plot pop up but it’s the same ole, same ole’ for Harvest Moon GB and Harvest Moon GBC2.

My wife scores Harvest Moon GBC 2 a 7.1 out of 10.

What would you write in your Harvest Moon GBC 2 review? Which Harvest Moon is your favorite? Do you play as a boy or a girl? Which Harvest Moon on the Game Boy is the best? Let me know your thoughts and memories, I’d love to read them!

Gradius Review

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Space Shooters were all the rage in the 80s, and Konami wanted to get in on the action. After success in the arcades, Gradius was released in 1986 in North America for the Nintendo Entertainment System. Gradius would go on to spawn numerous sequels as the weird space shooter would stay in commission for over two decades. There are floating Easter Island Heads in space during this Gradius review. You’ve been warned!

Gradius Plot:

The first thing I want to touch on is the fantastic artwork for Gradius. Back in the 80s and 90s, games really had to stick out with their covers because the internet was in its infancy and had few game sites where you could review opinions on games. Publishers had to attract gamers with their artwork and Gradius is top-notch. This looks like it’s straight from a movie poster with the beautiful space battle raging on. If I grew up in that era I would have picked out Gradius from the shelf for sure! It’s funny how some games had TERRIBLE artwork like the Mega Man series on the NES while others knocked it out of the park as Gradius did. Major bonus points for my Gradius review.

With no cut scenes to introduce you to the plot, I had to turn to the manual during my Gradius review to figure out who I was and what I was fighting for.

“The planet Gradius, a peaceful Earth-like world, is now under all-out space attack from their old nemesis, beings from the sub-space star cluster of Bacterion. The people of Gradius are in danger of being completely destroyed by the amoeboid Bacterions.

(What the hell is an amoeboid?)

To save them, you have just launched the prototype hyper-space fighter, the Warp Rattler. The entire galaxy awaits your duel to the death with the evil Bacterions.

Your objective is the Bacterion super fortress, Xaerous. To reach this, you must steal the enemy power capsules along your route and boost the Warp Rattler’s hyper-powers.

You are the last hope for the gentle people of Gradius! You will need all your courage and concentration to win. Get ready to blast off!”

So it’s typical that aliens have invaded or are about to and you must defeat their ships before they destroy a generic planet and civilization. Nothing special or unique here, move along.

Gradius Gameplay:

There are seven stages all of them being filled with unique enemies. You might see a squishy blob, a robot that walks on the ground that shoots you, or the most common enemy would be a spaceship. After almost every level during my Gradius review had a “main boss” but all of them are the same and super easy to defeat. Shoot the core and avoid being shot at, these guys are so easy that Hellen Keller could beat them. One enemy that came out of nowhere, that made me think “the fuck?” was the Easter Island Statues that are just randomly floating through space and shoot circle shock waves at you. Seriously, what were the programmers thinking?

“Hey boss, I developed a few more unique spaceship enemies to insert into level 3, want me to program them in now?”

“No, more Eastern Island Heads.”

“Okay, but the ships have unique shields and fire torpedos. They can –“

“MORE EASTER ISLAND HEADS!”

“Yes, sir.”

Anyway, each boss was protected by a much harder sequence of events. There were volcanoes that erupted that were difficult to maneuver past with all the flying magma and hordes of ships that appeared out of nowhere. I really liked the power-ups that came throughout the levels. You would fly into one, and then you could use it or choose to wait to get the next one and add it to your arsenal. For example, there were speed power-ups, a shield, double guns, and a little fireball that followed you and mimicked your actions. BUT BE CAREFUL, there is a very good reason there is a phrase that goes “Speed Kills” because it does. I used one too many speed power-ups during my Gradius review and my ship became almost uncontrollable. It was so fast I could hardly navigate it through the tight corridors or the 40 lasers that were being shot at me.

Overall difficulty ranged from medium chaos that was manageable to near-suicidal corridors that took me sometimes ten tries to get past. The main level was the hardest part, if you could get fly through that you’d fight a boss and they were pieces of cake. Especially the final boss, who is a giant brain? You just shoot it once and the game ends with an “epic” cutscene of the base exploding.

The best part of my Gradius review wasn’t the gameplay or story, it was the soundtrack and music! It was a peppy eight-bit symphony that made me feel like the game was encouraging me on my quest. If anyone is really into eight-bit soundtracks, check it out on YouTube. Overall, I beat this game in maybe four hours of actual gameplay? Pretty short, but tough to beat throughout the entire game.

Memories:
I first beat this game back in 2015. I started getting into retro gaming after college and wanted to try to simulate the classics the best I could. I purchased an NES USB controller and picked up an HDMI cord for my laptop. I don’t have a Nintendo so NES games I play on an emulator, shhh don’t tell Nintendo! I know it’s not the real thing, but it was cool to play Gradius with the NES controller on my tv. It was the first game I played with that setup and I’m happy I completed my Gradius review.

Gradius Review Score:

Gradius still has a small cult following and I’m curious as to why it hasn’t seen a release in the series since 2008 but back in the 80s, Gradius was synonymous with space shooters. It’s a fun game overall and doesn’t take itself too seriously. The boss battles were disappointing with the ease of them but the music is terrific.

Gradius scores a 7.4 out of 10.

What would you write in your Gradius review? Did you play Gradius as a kid? How does it compare to other space shooters and what’s up with those crazy Easter Island Heads floating in space? Let me know your thoughts and memories, I’d love to read them!

Mario Kart 64 Review

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Super Mario Kart ushered in a new genre of kart racing for generations of video games to come. In 1997, Nintendo and Shigeru Miyamoto were at it again with a follow-up on the Nintendo 64. How would the racer fare in 3D? Would it be able to keep up with its predecessor or would Mario Kart 64 get lapped? Gentlemen…start your engines, watch for the blue shell, and let’s head into this Mario Kart 64 review!

Mario Kart 64 Plot:

Just good ole fashion fun on a go-kart. Beat your opponents in four different cups, no need for a story!

Mario Kart 64 Gameplay:

Like the original Super Mario Kart, Mario Kart 64 offers eight different racers to play as. Mario, Luigi, Princess Peach, Donkey Kong, Toad, Bowser, Yoshi return but Koopa Trooper is replaced by Wario. Just like the first game, there are racing classes. Mario and Luigi are the most balanced racers, good at everything but great at nothing.

Princess Peach, Toad, and Yoshi accelerate quickly, can veer off the course for a bit without losing much speed, and have slightly higher maximum speeds. Turning is an issue as they lose speed if you don’t slide the kart and when they crash into heavier racers they will be thrown around like a rag doll.

Donkey Kong, Bowser, and Wario make up the big boys. They turn well and can crash into other karts to send them into walls. They tend to be slow off the line and it takes a while to get their karts up to maximum speed. If you veer off the course, they will slow down significantly. Like before, I stuck with Mario for my Mario Kart 64 review because I like balance.

The same game modes return with the ability to race in four different cups just like Super Mario Kart except you can race in the Special Cup without having to unlock it this time. When you select a cup, you’ll race on four different courses with the winner being awarded nine points, second place six points, third place three points, and so on. The racer with the most points after the four races wins the cup. You’ll be able to select your difficulty and this is where I have an issue with my Mario Kart 64 review.

I couldn’t tell the difference much between 50 CC and 100 CC. The easiest difficulty is 50 CC and I fully expected to run circles around the opponents except that wasn’t the case. It wasn’t that I crashed or wiped out, it’s just how the racers are programmed. No matter how many boosts or weapons you use, at least one racer but usually two will be right behind you and I mean right behind you! It was annoying to race half the course with another racer clogging up my screen during my Mario Kart 64 review. I’m not bad at Mario Kart 64 like I am with Super Mario Kart, and I was surprised to see my opponents right behind me constantly. It didn’t matter if I hit them with a banana or shell, seconds later they would be right behind me. The same thing happened whenever I got a boost. One time I got the golden mushroom which gave me an infinite boost for a short period. After I used it all, two seconds later the second-place racer was right behind me again. Sometimes the items felt useless but the same thing happened whenever I would get behind, I knew no matter what I’d be able to track down first place within a matter of seconds. I wish the difficulty varied between 50 CC and 100 CC more.

Items are back and there are a few new ones including the infamous blue shell that targets first place before exploding. Gone are the coins which you collected in the first one to go faster. I don’t know why they got rid of it, I thought it was a clever layer to the racing and was surprised it disappeared when I completed my Mario Kart 64 review.

Where Mario Kart 64 pulls away from Super Mario Kart is the ability for four players to race against each other on the couch. I mean, come on, when you think of the best couch co-op games that EVERYONE plays you think of Mario Kart 64 first. Almost everyone in college had a Nintendo 64 with Mario Kart in it for veteran and novice players alike at parties. The biggest thing that Mario Kart 64 improves upon is the courses. Super Mario Kart did what it could do on the Super Nintendo, but the 3D courses are a hundred times better. Not only are they longer but they provide an atmosphere that’s fun to drive by while you’re smashing into the opposition.

Let’s take a look at the courses you can select.

Luigi Raceway is the first course and it’s the most basic one for beginners to get a grip on the game.

Koopa Troopa Beach has jagged corners with waves washing up onshore. Be careful not to drive too far into the sand as the water will drown you.

Moo Moo Farm seems like it’s from Harvest Moon. Watch out for the moles who return from Super Mario Kart.

Kalimari Desert is one of my favorites. I always enjoy outracing the train before it crosses.

Toad’s Turnpike, just like racing through traffic on the highway.

Choco Mountain is a curvy course with falling boulders.

Frappe Snowland suffers from the “fog” effect that N64 and PlayStation games had as objects don’t appear until you close in on them, watch out for the snowmen because of this!

Mario Raceway is like Luigi Raceway and it’s a little boring.

Wario Stadium reminds me of a dirtbike course. Lots of ramps and jumps to hit.

Royal Raceway is home to Princess Peach. I want to drive off and visit the castle but I don’t dare.

Sherbet Land is home to annoying penguins that slide on their bellies. Don’t hit them!

Bowser’s Castle was the first course that frustrated me with the stupid Thwomps. They are rock faces that come down and slide around on the course like the ones in Super Mario Kart.

DK’s Jungle Parkway has natives that will throw stones at you if you leave the course, thankfully I never did.

Banshee Boardwalk had a few corners that were difficult with the missing railways.

Yoshi Valley was the only course that I didn’t place in the top three at first. It’s a small maze and I completely took the wrong turn during my first time racing on it. Once I knew which path to take it was a piece of cake.

Rainbow Road is the most famous course on all of the Mario Karts but it’s not difficult. It’s just very long but at least it’s pretty to race on with the faces lighting up in the sky.

Memories:
So many people my age have countless memories of Mario Kart 64 as a kid…however, I don’t! I never had an N64 growing up so the only memories I have of Mario Kart were playing it at college parties. I’ve been to a few barcades where they have Mario Kart 64 hooked up but it’s always the most popular game and usually requires a signup sheet. I did enjoy my time during my Mario Kart 64 review but I’m not nostalgic for it.

Mario Kart 64 Review Score:

Mario Kart 64 improves the courses dramatically from Super Mario Kart and presents a game that anyone can pick up anytime for a fun time. Don’t let your nostalgia for it overshadow the fact that it’s a mediocre racer. It’s better than Super Mario Kart, but it’s not the best in the series, not by a long shot.

Mario Kart 64 scores an 8.2 out of 10.

What would you write in your Mario Kart 64 review? What was your favorite character to race as? What was your favorite course? Is it the best in the series? Let me know your thoughts and memories, I’d love to read them!

Foul Play Review

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Beat ’em ups have fallen out of the mainstream machine of video games for quite some time now but now and then a game pops up that manages to add new mechanics or gameplay to the well-beaten genre. Released in 2013 for the Xbox 360 and 2015 for the PlayStation 4, Foul Play put together an impressive act that kept my attention. Mediatonic and Devovler Digital came together to put out the brawler. Let’s break a leg out there for this PlayStation 4 Foul Play review!

Foul Play Plot:

The entire game takes place on a theater stage starring Baron Dashforth and his trusty sidekick Scampwick. Mr. Dashforth is a renowned Daemonlogist and tells the audience of his legendary tale. His life’s work includes killing monsters and daemons in the dark. His tale begins in Cairo, Egypt in 1895. A group of villagers has been possessed by daemons around a dig site and it’s up to Mr. Dashforth and Scampwick to clear them out. The duo clears out the diggers and runs into the British army and General Cain, a menacing giant who shoots his golden cannon to wreak havoc on his foes. Mr. Dashforth and Scampwick defeat General Cain and with his dying breath warns them that they too will kneel before “him”.

They enter a tomb and continue to fight possessed beings and mummies underground making their way to the Mummy King. Together they fight him and send him back into another dimension where he drops a top hat. Shocked, Mr. Dashforth picks it up and proclaims that the hat belongs to his father.

The Cairo encounter was twenty years ago. Mr. Dashforth continues telling his story revealing that his father was a Daemonoligist too but he disappeared long ago. Five years pass and since the Cairo outing and Mr. Dashforth and Scampwick find themselves outside of a small town in England. The townsfolk are spooked and hostile refusing to let them get near. Mr. Dashworth suspects foul play and the two fight their way into the town. Werewolves have overrun the city and winged daemons swoop down and abduct citizens. They continue to clear the city of danger including hedge monsters, stone knights, and vampires before fighting the Vampire King who is a daemon. They defeat him and send him back to his dimension through a portal. The daemon drops a monocle with the initials H.D. etched into it. Mr. Dashforth reveals that his father’s initials are H.D.

Five more years pass and Mr. Dashforth continued his father’s research believing that his father may be trying to contact him through these daemons. Mr. Dashforth and Scampwick head to the Bermuda coastline as they’ve heard of daemons terrorizing the place. They hop on a pirate ship that sails out into the ocean. Soon, the ship is attacked by a sea monster sinking it. Mr. Dashforth and Scampwick fall to the bottom of the sea where King Neptune awaits them. He tells them that he is granting them the ability to breathe underwater so they can fight the daemons that have invaded his sunken city. After fighting mermaids, robots, and crabs they encounter the pirate captain again who is now possessed as a sea monster. They defeat him and send him back through a portal where he drops a cane belonging to Mr. Dashforth’s father. Inspecting the cane reveals that it’s etched with markings that make up a map.

Back in the present day, Mr. Dashforth’s library and research lab are raided by a gang of daemon cultists. Mr. Dashforth and Scampwick fight the cultists across London and end up in the clock tower where the cult leader reads a passage from a book and transforms into a daemon. They defeat him and send him back through a portal where he drops a pocket watch. The pocket watch belonged to Mr. Dashforth’s father. The watch is set for November 4th, 1911 the date of the present day.

With his father’s possessions, Mr. Dashforth summons a gate to hell and enters it with Scampwick. After fighting hordes of daemons, Mr. Dashforth finds his father imprisoned by the Daemon King. Together they defeat the Daemon King and free his father as they are transported back to the theater stage ending the play. The three of them take a bow and the curtains fall.

Foul Play Gameplay:

Foul Play is a unique brawler. The entire game is set on the stage of the theater where an audience watches the scenes unfold. You don’t have health or hit points, instead, you have to keep the audience entertained by successfully defeating enemies and pulling off combos. They will cheer when you are throwing enemies by the wayside and boo when you are near the brink of death. They even chant your name which they did many times during my Foul Play review.

It was a brilliantly added element to the game and made the brawler feel refreshing. Every enemy is wearing a costume, each mummy, monster, daemon, and devil is a man in a suit. When I defeated them during my Foul Play review they fell to the ground, sometimes exaggerated but always entertaining. As you walk away they will either crawl to the end of the stage or be yanked away by a cane. Our favorite character was the janitor who was often caught in the middle of the scene cleaning up, drinking coffee, or pulling a prop. Foul Play has a terrific atmosphere that never takes itself too seriously.

Pulling off combos is crucial for the audience to stay entertained. Each “act” you make it through will unlock new moves and combos to help you build up the audience. We added small power-ups throughout our Foul Play review by performing several challenges throughout the acts. They vary from “get a 100 combo move”, “take no damage” or “throw an opponent through a certain object”. These add fun minigames to each act. The five acts are all different and all fun to replay which I wanted to do as soon as I completed my Foul Play review.

Foul Play offers a mild challenge but the fun is the atmosphere and watching the play unfold. You’ll be able to beat the game within a day, but it’s best played with a friend on the couch which is what I did with my wife. We absolutely loved our playthrough and Foul Play review.

Memories:
My wife and I played Foul Play over a weekend and were delighted to find such a unique game that offered humor, a new atmosphere, and a mild challenge. There are no voice actors in the game so we would take turns performing the roles of the characters when they spoke, after all, it was a play! Sometimes my wife will say something and the accent she used for Scampwick comes out. It’s a great game to play with a friend and I highly encourage it especially if you like beat ’em ups.

Foul Play Review Score:

Humor, a new atmosphere, and tons of fun. Foul Play, take a bow!

Foul Play scores an 8.3 out of 10.

What would you write in your Foul Play review? What was your favorite act during Foul Play? Who was the toughest boss you faced? Did you team up with a friend or did you beat it on your own? Let me know your thoughts and memories, I’d love to read them!

God of War III Review

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After the first two God of Wars, I can’t imagine other games that were as hyped as God of War III especially because it was the series’ first outing on the PlayStation 3. Santa Monica Studio and Sony teamed up again and released the third game in 2010 to massive critical and commercial success. Kratos returns to strike his vengeance on the Olympian gods with the help of the Titans. How does his third adventure stack up against his first two? A new power is granted… the ability to forgive but will Kratos still excel in this God of War III review?

God of War III Plot:

If you will recall from my God of War II review, Kratos had made a pack with the Titans to kill the gods on Olympus. The third game starts as Kratos and Gaia arrive at the top of Mount Olympus quickly killing Poseidon! (Already, so cool!) Poseidon’s death results in the oceans flooding around the mountain. Their next target is Zeus who Gaia raised as a child but he is much tougher than Poseidon and is able to push Kratos and Gaia off the mountain. Gaia catches herself, but Kratos isn’t so lucky. He asks for Gaia’s help but she shuns him claiming he was nothing but a pawn for her and the Titans.

Kratos falls into the water beneath Mount Olympus and floats into the soul river that leads to the underworld. His power is drained and he loses his weapons. Weakened and clinging to life, Kratos finds Athena’s spirit who tells him she is now a higher-being with a new vision of the truth. She tells Kratos in order to kill Zeus, he must put out the flame of Olympus and defeat him. As long as Zeus rules, mankind will have no future. Kratos receives the Blades of Exile from Athena as she disappears.

Making his way through the underworld and completing numerous quests, Kratos finds Hades and kills him releasing the souls of the underworld in the process. Kratos makes his way back to Mount Olympus and finds a wounded Gaia begging for his help. We all know that Kratos is very forgiving and merciful but to my utter shock he cuts off Gaia’s arm as she falls from Mount Olympus. Later during the climb, Kratos comes across Helios, the God of Light or the sun, either way, he is important for daylight. Helios is battling a titan as Kratos interrupts the fight and shoots him down. The death of Helios plunges the world into darkness, but Kratos literally rips the head of Helios off and uses it to light his path! How epic is that! Big points in my God of War III review!

The next several hours of gameplay Kratos kills or interacts with various gods and beings such as Hermes, Athena, Hercules, Hephaestus, Cronos, Hera, and Aphrodite who you know Kratos was going to rail. (He does and you watch, oh the joy of the old God of Wars)

During these battles, Kratos discovers he needs to find the real Pandora to open up her box to give him the power to kill Zeus. The box is protected by flames and only Pandora herself can open it. After rescuing Pandora and bringing her to the box, she sacrifices herself to reveal an open box. Zeus crashes the party and begins to battle with Kratos. Meanwhile, Gaia has climbed back up Mount Olympus and tries to kill both Kratos and Zeus who defeat her before continuing their fight.

During the climax, Kratos stabs Zeus with the Blade of Olympus against Gaia’s heart. It is believed that Zeus is dead until his spirit attacks Kratos causing him to lose his powers and weapons. Kratos goes into a trance where he is visited by Pandora and then the spirits of his wife and daughter who he slaughtered long ago. Finally able to forgive himself for his wrongdoings, Kratos snaps out of his trance and kills Zeus once and for all.

Athena appears and asks Kratos to return what he took from Pandora’s box. It’s revealed that the box was not empty but had hope in it and that it manifested into Kratos. He decides to stab himself with the Blade of Olympus and releases the hope from his body to the race of man. Kratos wanders off leaving a trail of blood and disappearing.

God of War III Gameplay:

The God of War series has always had fantastic boss encounters and with every installment, the boss fights become more epic. During my God of War III review this trend continued as I took down Olympian Gods one-by-one. One of the more clever ones was when you fight Hades in the underworld. Hades doesn’t try to kill Kratos but instead snatch his soul away with his weapon, slowly pulling away at it as the battle rages on. It’s clever and shows the care that the creators used when crafting this world.

Unfortunately, it seems that every God of War starts with Kratos being stripped of his powers so easily. It’d be nice not to have to work your way back to full strength. Just like the last couple of God of Wars, you’ll hack and slash your way through various stages, solve puzzles and collect objects to power up Kratos. It seems like I’m cutting the gameplay section short in this God of War III review but if you want more in-depth mechanics just read the previous God of War reviews as it’s the same. It’s not a bad thing at all, I love that they kept the same gameplay, it’s what makes God of War so special.

The conclusion of the trilogy is fitting. I loved the entire saga in ancient Greece and I believe they gave Kratos a proper send-off with his vengeance satisfied. Kratos forgives himself and that’s something I thought would never happen. It sets the stage for the events of the next God of War where we see a much more mature and calm Kratos. From the first game to the third, Kratos faced epic danger around every corner, it was a pleasure to play. Kratos is one of the best video game characters created and it was a roller coaster to watch his arc play out. I’m happy that in the end he found peace, and even more happy I was able to complete this God of War III review.

Memories:
I asked for God of War III one year for my birthday and received it from my mom. It took me almost three years to complete my God of War III review as I simply didn’t have time. This was my favorite installment of Kratos.

God of War III Review Score:

Kratos gets his wish of revenge on the gods and in a surprising twist is able to forgive himself for his terrible sins. There was no let down at the end of this trilogy with every boss fight better than the last. It’s not often you cheer for a blood-crazed, mass-murdering selfish jerk but God of War had me cheering for Kratos to win.

God of War III scores a 9.9 out of 10.

What would you write in your God of War III review? What was your favorite god or titan to kill? What was your favorite God of War from the original trilogy? Do you remember the hype around God of War III? Let me know your thoughts and memories, I’d love to read them!

If you want to own God of War III you can purchase a preowned copy of it for the PlayStation 3 on eBay for at least $8.

Zillion Review

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Back in the 80s, Anime was exploding in popularity in Japan. Anime had great plots, cute girls, and tons of action so the conversion of an anime show into a video game seemed inevitable. One of the earliest conversions was Zillion which aired from April 1987 to December 1987 in Japan. Sega would release Zillion for the Sega Master System on December 31st, 1987 in North America. While the North American audience had no idea what Zillion the show was about, the video game would find critical success and become one of the most unique games on the system. Feel the power of the Zillion in this Zillion review!

Zillion Plot:

~~I have never watched the anime show~~ “~~Zillion” so I’m not sure if the video game is connected to any of the plots from the show.~~ Update: I watched the entire series of Zillion and I loved it. My god, please give me more of this anime. The game has four characters, with three of them being playable. The main character is JJ. His mission is to infiltrate the Norsa Empire underground laboratory, collect five floppy discs that contain top-secret plans for the Norsa Empire, rescue two other members of the team and destroy the main computer in the base.

JJ is part of the White Knights and has three other members on the mission with him. Amy will stay on the ship and heal you if you approach her. Her role is to keep the ship running and report back to the White Knights. Apple is a FEMALE white knight, and I write that in caps because the manual says she is a HE and it’s clearly a mistake. In the anime, Apple is a female and her figure confirms this in the game as well as her face. I wonder what other small mistakes are scattered throughout other video game manuals. Anyway, Apple has been captured and you need to rescue her. There’s another member of your team imprisoned in the base. His name is Champ, and he is kind of a dick.

Your gun is called the “Zillion” laser which is supposed to be very powerful. It’s also an icon of the game as it’s the menu and I know it was made into a toy. With the Zillion laser, JJ rescues Apple and Champ and the three of them make their way throughout the base collecting floppy discs. For you youngins out there, floppy discs were square flat devices you stuck in the computer to save or install programs and files. We used them in the 80s and early 90s before the invention of the CD.

Once you’ve collected the floppy discs and started the self-destruct sequence, you’ll have 300 seconds to escape the base. When you exit the computer room you’ll be greeted by a mecha-lizard that shoots blue fire. It scared me honestly during my Zillion review because I was not expecting it at all. It’s the only boss of the game. After your team takes down the mecha-lizard, you make your way back up to the ground and escape on the ship with your team.

You receive a small message about how most of the Norsa soldiers have escaped but you destroyed the base and the mission is complete. The main villain of the Norsa Empire is one of the weirdest enemies. I don’t exactly know where his face is but he looks like a T-shirt with boney arms. You never fight him or see him throughout the entire game except for when you die or beat the game. He just says a few words and that’s it.

Zillion Gameplay:

You may not know anything about the anime but you don’t need to in order to experience the exceptional gameplay and design of Zillion that I found during my Zillion review. Almost all of the game will take place underground in the labyrinth base of the Norsa Empire. There’s only one humanoid enemy but they occupy almost every screen. You’ll fight Norsa soldiers who attack with their laser guns. Most of them shoot chest level but you can duck or jump over those. Advanced soldiers can crouch down and shoot at you when you’re crawling. One blast from your laser gun should do the trick and explode them into a hundred pieces.

The object of Zillion is to make your way through the base. There will be small hallways and elevators but the majority of the base will be single-screen rooms that have numerous obstacles in them. I faced Norsa Soldiers, electric fields, motorized floors, trap lasers that set off alarms, and laser turrets that moved around the room during my Zillion review. Throughout each room, you’ll need to shoot lockers. These lockers will have power-ups to level up your gun, health, jumping ability, as well as ID cards. Why do you need an ID card? Well, there’s a computer in each room and you’ll need an ID card to input commands. In the lockers will be symbols, you’ll need to memorize the symbols that are in the lockers and input them into the computer to unlock the next door or elevator. You’ll encounter close to 50 different rooms and each one is unique and filled with various dangers that increase the deeper you go into the base.

The rooms ranged from easy to difficult and there were a few times when I struggled to get past one during my Zillion review. You’ll need to sketch a map as you go because you WILL get lost in the maze. It’s also necessary to escape the base when you set the main computer to self-destruct. There are rooms that you may be able to access but won’t be able to pass unless you have properly leveled up your gun or jumping ability. The characters you rescue will also have different properties. JJ is the most balanced overall, Apple can jump high and runs quick, and Champ is slow but has the most health. Writing this Zillion review makes me want to go back and play it all again.

Back to the computer commands, remember this was made in 1987. Sega had an incredible vision and created a video game where you use computers to advance. It’s brilliant but not just because you can type in a few commands to pass on to the next room. You can program the computers to stop the turrets, lasers, and electric fields. You can even bring up a map, warp back to an elevator and even commit suicide! Death by typing is every journalist’s dream!

Memories:
Zillion is special to me because the first game console I ever had was the Sega Master System. For some reason, my dad had a copy of Zillion. It was so advanced for a kid to play and it’s difficult now as an adult to beat. I loved the sounds and music that played during the game. I never came close to ever beating the game as a kid, I remember I rescued Apple and thought I was the next savior of video games afterward. Looking back at it now, I’m still impressed I managed to do that when I was six or seven. It’s surreal to beat the game now, and complete my Zillion review almost 25 years later. What a great game.

Zillion Review Score:

Zillion presents a unique video game based on an anime few have ever seen. The Sega Master System has very few mega-hits on it but has numerous under-the-radar games. Zillion would be at the top of that list. It’s futuristic, difficult, and requires a combination of skill and memorization. It’s a treat for anyone who enjoys a challenge. I highly recommend it if you have the patience to map the labyrinth. Nice job, Sega.

Zillion scores a 9.3 out of 10.

What would you write in your Zillion review? Have you watched the Zillion anime or played the game? Did you exit the labyrinth alive or were you stuck down there forever like I was in my childhood? Let me know your thoughts and memories, I’d love to read them!

Power Stone 2 Review

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After the hit that was Power Stone in 1999, Capcom got back to work with its sequel and in 2000 released Power Stone 2 for the Sega Dreamcast offering an array of new gameplay, characters, and modes. Would the new additions work in the arena fighter or would the original hold the power? We’re looking for more magical stones in this Power Stone 2 review!

Power Stone 2 Plot:

After the events of Power Stone, our cast of characters find themselves continuing to search for more stones to make their wishes come true. One day a mysterious castle arrives floating in the sky surrounded by dark clouds. Each of the characters are drawn to it by a source of power.

I won’t go into detail explaining during this Power Stone 2 review on who each of the old characters is but I’ll tell you how they get to the castle and why. With the new fighters, I’ll give some backstory to them as they are introduced to the series for the first time.

Edward Falcon – Our favorite airplane pilot was traveling in his plane when a storm overtakes control and sends it crashing into the floating island of the castle. Edward gets out and decides to explore the castle.

Ayame – After deceiving her master in the first Power Stone by giving him a fake stone, Ayame receives a letter from him summoning her. Worried that he has discovered her secret she sets out to find a real power stone to give to him. Ayame discovers the floating castle and heads toward it in hopes of uncovering a stone.

Gunrock – Having grown bored from all the drinking and gambling after acquiring a power stone, Gunrock wants to go on another treasure hunt. After hearing a rumor about a floating castle nearby, Gunrock launches himself from an air cannon and lands on the castle.

Ryoma – Discovering a legendary sword has Ryoma reflecting its edge in the moonlight. One night, the sword reflects a floating castle in the clouds. Believing the castle is evil, Ryoma floats up into the sky with the help of his legendary sword.

Wang-Tang – Training on the top of a mountain in martial arts, a giant shadow descends upon Wang-Tang. Looking up, he discovers the castle above his head. Believing this is the final trial of his training, Wang-Tang jumps to the castle and enters it.

Galuda – Enjoying his honeymoon with his bride, the two are flying around on a cruise airship. When the ship hits something, the pair are thrown from the ship. Galuda wakes up next to the castle. Believing his wife is in danger and inside the castle, he enters it in hopes of finding his wife.

Rouge – As a fortune teller, Rouge often uses her crystal ball to see the future. One day while using it the crystal cracks as dark clouds hover over Rogue. She decides to meditate to find the source of the dark clouds and when she opens them she is inside of a castle.

Jack – With the power stone granting all his wishes, Jack continues to wish for “shiny” things and objects to “slice”. A voice enters his head telling him a castle will appear during the next full moon that will be full of treasure and shiny things. When the full moon appears, Jack discovers the castle and is absorbed into it.

That’s it for the old characters, but Power Stone 2 introduces a few new ones for you to play as!

Pete – He’s a wooden puppet who just wants to be a real boy. One day he comes to life in the toy box of a child. Pete dreams of creating things to delight others and is whisked away through the window to a castle. Sounds a lot like another wooden puppet from Disney.

Julia – Hailing from an elegant rich family, Julia, is bipolar. Her family makes her act proper with grace but she has another side to her where she has dark desires with a radical personality. The family has a power stone that helps controls Julia’s split personality but one day she runs away and finds herself inside a mysterious castle.

Gourmand – As the head chef of a luxurious airship, Gourmand enjoys the ritzy life. He takes his cooking very seriously and will do anything to get his hands on rare ingredients. One day he sees a floating castle as the airship flies by. He believes there could be some new ingredients he’s never used before in the castle and takes a leap to land on it.

Accel – He’s a rouge outlaw and gunman who was ambushed by a gang. They tie him to a hot air balloon and he floats into the sky. Accel passes out and wakes up in a castle with a power stone in his hand. He feels a thirst for revenge against the ones who put him here.

Power Stone 2 Gameplay:

I was blown away by the leap in gameplay and upgrades during my Power Stone 2 review. In the original Power Stone (a great game) you’re put into an arena with breakable objects, weapons, and other items to use as you fight another character. You’ll fight numerous characters until you fight the final boss. That gameplay is typical of almost every fighting game out there, but Power Stone 2 adds another layer.

Aside from more characters to play as you start with a level selection screen choosing where you want to start your adventure. After defeating your first opponent you’ll continue to have two different paths to choose from. I loved this during my Power Stone 2 review and it made me really feel like I was in control of the game. Each level was fun and unique and after playing them a few times I knew which ones I liked and which ones I wanted to avoid.

Another inclusion in Power Stone 2 is bosses. I know Power Stone had final fights that were extremely tough against Valgas and Kraken but in Power Stone 2 you will fight a Pharaoh Walker halfway through your adventure and the end boss named Dr. Erode. The Pharaoh Walker is a giant walking artifact found in the desert. It will spin around knocking you down, jump on you and try to gobble you up. Taking out two of its legs will make it fall where you can attack its head.

The final boss is a giant looking zombie. To get to him you’ll have to defeat a few wooden soldiers and climb the stairs to face him. He’ll try and eat you with a fork. You’ll have to avoid his sweeping hands, stabbing fork and sharp teeth as you attack his head to open up his heart compartment. He’s much easier to defeat than Valgas but still gave me a challenge.

If you’ve played PlayStation All-Stars for the PS3 you’ll be aware of the levels shifting environments. Power Stone 2 did this and I loved it. Each level has unique timed events where you will have to run to escape danger or manage shifting cliffs or spikes. This made each level essentially split in two and offered even more gameplay. for my Power Stone 2 review.

Memories:
I never played Power Stone 2 growing up and I never knew Power Stone had a sequel. I’m bummed that the series is dead as the first two games are great.

Power Stone 2 Review Score:

Power Stone 2 builds upon a great arena fighter adding more characters, unique items, bosses, and layered gameplay with the levels. Capcom did a terrific job sending this series out on the right note. I thoroughly enjoyed my Power Stone 2 review.

Power Stone 2 scores an 8.5 out of 10.

What would you write in your Power Stone 2 review? Who was your favorite character in Power Stone 2? Did you find the final boss tough? Would you like to see the Power Stone series return? Let me know your thoughts and memories, I’d love to read them!

Fighting Force Review

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In 1997, Core Design and Eidos teamed up to release the 3D beat ’em up “Fighting Force” for the PlayStation. The game featured four playable characters, destructible 3D environments, and tons of items to be used as weapons. Fighting Force was popular enough to become a “Greatest Hits” for the PS1 and even spawned a sequel. WARNING: This game is for gamers with IQs of 300+++ so proceed with this Fighting Force review with caution.

Fighting Force Plot:

If you pop in Fighting Force on your PS1 and start it up, you wouldn’t have any idea what the plot is or why you are beating up these waves of agents, security guards, and thugs. I’ve had Fighting Force for over 20 years, beaten it multiple times, and never once knew what the story was until now. I opened the case and took out the manual for the first time. The case is rough in shape but the manual is in near-perfect condition. I was blown away by how much of a story there actually is to Fighting Force including character profiles. Let me show you some snippets of what’s in the manual to help give a better idea of what we are getting into during this Fighting Force review.

“It is a few years past the Millennium and Dr. Dex Zeng is INFURIATED. As a former high powered GOVERNMENT AGENT with his nose in many areas (including the SEEDY and LICENTIOUS New York UNDERGROUND), as well as a renowned radical scientist and professor in Theology, Dr. Dex Zeng TRULY believed the end of the world would come by the YEAR 2000.

EVENTS occurring toward the turn of the century confirmed to Dr. Zeng that the year 2000 would bring ARMAGEDDON. The signs were clear! Zeng was so sure, in fact, that he even convinced many of his ex-employees (who happened to be prominent members of local militias) that this was fact and they helped him prepare for this almighty CONCLUSION.

Zeng is like a better-functioning idiot savant. He is brilliant in what he does. He sets his mind to a goal and achieves it – no matter what.

Over the years, Zeng has developed a MEGALOMANICAL complex that many suspect may have been caused by the use of SYNTHETIC DRUGS he’s made for the government and tested on himself and other family members.

Like the few megalomaniacs in history, he actually thinks he is the KEEPER of the EARTH. The Father Nature, the Chosen One. He feels that anyone in his PRESENCE should bow before his AS THOUGH he WERE a god.

When the MILLENNIUM hit us at 12:01 am January 1, 2000…

NOTHING HAPPENED!

Filled with outrage intensified by those who surround him, Dr. Dex Zeng insists that SOMETHING WENT WRONG. He knows from his years and years of reading, teaching and hypothesizing that IT WAS SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN. Fortunately, Dr. Zeng had a plan in CASE something like this did happen. He is prepared to FIX the Apocalypse – to FORCE it – to CORRECT the malfunction. And the scary part is – HE IS ONE OF THE VERY FEW WHO CAN MAKE IT HAPPEN!

Dr. Zeng now believes that it is HIS JOB, to, AT ANY COST – END THE WORLD. With the help of biological warfare devices and several militant followers, as well as his connections in the Underground, it shouldn’t be difficult.

BUT, one of Dr. Zeng’s lab assistants, Snapper, decides she can no longer stand this man’s corruption and calls a friend to help in stopping him.

With this act, she helps bring together what will be known as one of the most VOLATILE TEAMS EVER CREATED!

IT’S TIME TO END — THE END OF THE WORLD!

Whew, okay that’s over and yes it’s that ridiculous and over the top with the caps lock. As you see, Dr. Zeng is a whack job and wants nothing more than to bring about the destruction of the world! That’s where the “Fighting Force” comes in.

Let’s take a look at the four members that make up the Fighting Force unit. If you got a kick out of how ridiculous the story is, wait till you read these character bios. I’ll try and keep them short and pick out the good bits.

MACE DANIELS – She’s a private investigator who is one hot woman with a taste for blood as well as desire. She’s the one who teases and taunts you just before she takes you out.

Mace is beautiful. She’s not brash or loud or annoying. She would purr to her assailant rather than say, “Hey Punk!” Mace is a woman aware of her sexual magnetism. Yet, she couldn’t care less about men. She is always being pursued without giving ANYONE the time of day. Oh and her IQ is 200.

HAWK MANSON – He was once a freedom fighter for all the social wrongs in the world. Well, nice guys finish last, and Hawk learned that lesson all too well! Hawk has seen Mace fight and this is one thing that stirs him inside like nothing else. When Mace approaches him for the job – by pinning him to the ground, smiling a sexy smile, and telling him that she needs his help, Hawk is DEFINITELY stirred! He also took the job because it is the first job in a long time that is tinged with a bit of “goodness”. Hawk’s IQ is 187.

(This is so hilarious and trashily bad)

BEN SMASHER JACKSON – The first thing I will say is Brick from Borderlands looks just like Smasher. Perhaps he is his long lost son.

Ben Jackson has been serving multiple life sentences and the prison is very fond of him. They rent him out as it cuts down on prison deaths and puts money into their fund. Hawk Manson has been renting Ben out of the prison, sorta like “rent to own” LOL only the 90s!

ALANA MCKENDRICK – Alana is a raver. She spends her nights dancing away and most of her days with little sleep while she goes to school. Alana has been trying to put an end to Dr. Zeng ever since he tried to experiment on her with drugs he had created. It turns out Dr. Zeng is Alana’s illegitimate father! She is approached by Mace to join the force and accepts. It’s just not her style to get serious until she’s kicking butt and believe me, some heads will CRACK! Oh, Alana is 17 and has an IQ of 240.

Here’s a little bonus from the manual, Dr. Zeng’s IQ is 300 +++ ( I can’t make this stuff up!)

Well, I don’t know about you but this story has me in tears. What ridiculous characters and plot. I love it! Let’s smash our way into this Fighting Force review gameplay section to see if it’s still ridiculous.

Fighting Force Gameplay:

Fighting Force at its core is a beat ’em up where you take on waves of enemies, clear an area, and move on. You’ll be able to pick from four different characters, each with their own moves and fighting styles. During my Fighting Force review I picked Smasher and my wife picked Mace. We teamed up and took down wave after wave of thugs, mercenaries, and security on our way to kick Dr. Zeng’s ass.

Along the way, you’ll be picking up money stacks, jewels, and gold bars to add to your score. You can also pick up health packs to restore your health bar. My favorite part about Fighting Force was the destructible environment. Want to pull off that handrail and club someone over the head with it? You can. See that parked cop car? Punch and kick it enough for it to explode and you’ll be able to pick up the tire and throw it at someone. Fighting Force offers many weapons at your disposal including knives, bottles, pipes, baseball bats, guns, bazookas, and even dynamite.

Where Fighting Force falls short is the graphics. I understand the PS1 was limited but man, the character models were so blocky and blurry. It didn’t help that we played it on my 58-inch television where the screen was stretched but they were pretty ugly, to begin with. During my Fighting Force review, I fought five or six henchmen at a time, each with stupid names that rotate. Fighting Force is a very easy game and we only struggled in one section, right before the final boss there was a section in his base where it seemed like you had to fight 50 men before clearing the area. Speaking of bosses they are a joke. Dr. Zeng despite having a 300 +++ IQ didn’t do anything besides guard against my punches. I just repeatedly pushed the “X” button for two minutes while he blocked. His health bar slowly drained and that was it. Most of the boss fights were just like that.

There are a few small cutscenes but they are all short which is good because the graphics are terrible. Fighting Force does offer replayability with its different character choices and pathways to Dr. Zeng. There will be zones where you can pick where to go next. For example, there was a section where we had to choose whether we went to the mall, the Bronx, or the subway. Throughout the Fighting Force review, there were three or four sections that will offer us choices. If you want to play again you can pick different paths to play.

The Fighting Force disc offered three demos and a few trailers to watch. I thought this was awesome and remembered this was how games used to be advertised. I miss this!

Memories:
I remember the day I got “Fighting Force”. For some random reason, I already had “Fighting Force 2” but my dad and I were at Walmart. There was a bin of cheap games, something like $10 PS1 games and my dad told me I could pick one out. I ended up finding Fighting Force and I already had the second so I figured I might as well play the first. Since getting Fighting Force I’ve beaten it a few times and brought it back out once or twice every five years for kicks. It was fun showing it to my wife. At first, she hated it because the graphics were so terrible but she soon learned the controls and started to enjoy it. We beat the game together and completed my Fighting Force review.

Fighting Force Review Score:

Fighting Force may present itself as a “badass” game filled with ridiculous notions, plots, and characters but it’s a pushover. It does some good stuff, but for the most part, Fighting Force is nothing but a repeating button masher where you quickly advance to the end.

Fighting Force scores a 6.5 out of 10.

What would you write in your Fighting Force review? Who was your favorite character is Fighting Force? What weapon did you like to use? Was it just as easy for you too? Let me know your thoughts and memories, I’d love to read them!